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Open Mindedness – Video Blog

by admin on September 19, 2013 No comments

Flo blog #3

Hey there in blog–land! Hope you’re doing well Today is #3 blog on communication. Florence would call it, ‘open-mindedness.’

Last time, we talked about listening – thoroughly. Giving the other person your undivided attention.

But I want to add a bit… Remember in the 90’s when there was all that talk about multi-tasking? When some of us got so proud that we could pull off more than one thing at a time? Sure, anybody who has kids knows about this—it’s called survival !

But the newest brain research shows that if you’ve already learned how, you can pat your head and rub your tummy at the same time, which are gross motor movements, BUT, if you have to do any real thinking, or learning, like reacting in traffic, or answering a question, the brain can only handle one abstract thought at a time.

And that brings us back to the next point about listening. You really need to STOP what you’re doing and listen When someone is telling you something. You make eye contact, and then you’re ready for the next step. In improv, it’s called “Accepting”

Which is not necessarily the same as agreeing. It’s more than just understanding what was said It’s adding to it…in a way that keeps the conversation going. For example- let me show you what doesn’t work-  If your coworker says, “Let’s have a potluck on Friday,” and you reply with, “Yeah, but every time we do that, there’s a huge mess to clean up.”

You’ve just BLOCKED the flow.

Instead, How would be if you said, “YES, and let’s post a list – so we’ll have volunteers to clean up- maybe let them eat first?”

See the difference? In the first example, you’re perceived as a party-pooper. In the second, you’re a leader! It’s all in how you frame it. That’s how we Go with the Flo—

See you next time,

Ciao!

 

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adminOpen Mindedness – Video Blog

Mom’s Need to Nurture

by Candy on July 23, 2012 No comments

My daughter, who moved  home to finish a master’s degree in healthcare administration, will be taking off to Europe again today.

She has lived abroad before, so I know she knows how to navigate in a foreign country. She is also going to meet up with one of her best friends, and they will visit one of our previous exchange students, so I know she’ll be in good company. She’s brushing up on her german, so I know she won’t starve. 

Then why am I fretting? If she were married, or in her own place,  I wouldn’t be a part of the getting-ready process. Out of the loop, I’d be just waiting for the postcards.

But, no.

When a grown child lives with you, a parent has the opportunity to let go and hold-on simultaneously. This can be confusing for both parties.

Speaking of parties, it feels like that most of the time, with her around.  

The cat is eyeing her suitcase, suspiciously. He wants to jump in, and so do I. We will both howl when she leaves.

Seems like moms never outgrow their need to nurture.

 

 

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CandyMom’s Need to Nurture